So ready now

For two and half months, I've been wearing the Clamshell Brace to protect my spinal fusion following surgery. I feel much better now, but this 4-1/2 pound hunk of plastic and metal and velcro feels rather heavy by evening. I am so ready to be free! Only, apparently, according to my doctor, Not.

Have you ever had to wear a cast? When I broke my foot, they just put me in a surgical boot. Bad enough, and crutches are the worst. And I hear that the one I wear isn't the worst Clamshell Brace you can be put into. There's one with a leg cuff!!!

Still. Friday night and I have nowhere to go but bed. I can't even sit in a movie theater in this thing. Not that I'm feeling sorry for myself, but really. As Amy Poehler would say, "Reeeaaalllly?!!!"

P.S. Mine doesn't look exactly like this -- it has some fashionable over-the-shoulder straps and a giant T-brace at my neck to anchor them. So Xena Warrior Princess, without the superpowers. So completely doesn't go with anything in my wardrobe but sweats.

P.P.S. No, there will be no poems ensuing from this.